Over-thinking

OK...for the new year....a resolution:
to QUIT over-thinking the need for each blog post to be poetic, and a thorough rendition of our life and the kids' milestones. I need to just get on here and record things -- for the occasional reader and for our memory's sake.

BEN: at 8 months, 2 weeks: full on army crawling, with coordinated arms and legs and PULLING UP to stand! He is so impressed with himself when he can get up at the music table or the coffee table or the ottoman...you name it, the boy wants to stand near it!  He's doing really well with his jar foods, taking 2 jars each day and cheerios/puffs/yogurt melts. He also will mash on bite-sized bananas, too. Still no teeth in sight...but, that doesn't seem to stop him.

RACHAEL: Her language is exploding and she's doing well at learning Spanish words as well as signs in American Sign Language at school. By 22 1/2 months, she finally finished cutting all 4 incisors...thank goodness that's over...they were painful for her. And, on December 17, 2011, during the bedtime routine, instead of just muttering her usual "wuv" to Daddy, Mommy and Ben on her way upstairs, she said, "Wuv you, Daddy. Wuv you, Mommy".......OH. MY. GOODNESS.  Heart melting....all over the floor. She has no idea how sweet those words are to hear -- I don't think it'll ever get old.

Pictures next time, promise!

7 & 21

Let's start with a recap of month 7 for Ben, shall we?
He really became an 'expert' sitter this month! And with the ability to sit, comes the ability to play with Rachael's toys in new and annoying-to-her ways! His steady body and solid hand dexterity really make a difference in the way he explores the world. And, watching Ben makes me realize how different Rachael's skills were at the same age. As we knew then, what she had in gross motor, Ben has in fine motor skills. Everyone's different, right?
He also continues to work on his pre-crawling skills and will absolutely breakout in belly laughing if you giggle right along with him or tickle any of his numerous tickle spots!

And, moving right along to month 21 for Rachael:
Rachael started "running" more this month...really picking her knees up and moving with more speed when she wanted to 'run'. She continues the language spree -- really trying to figure out the possessive -- is it blankie Rachael or Rachael's blankie? And, sad, but, true, the TV has entered her field of view. (Rhyme unintended there, but, fun, nonetheless!) So, she can now sit and watch a 1/2 hour program without being distracted. This can be helpful when you need to feed Ben or cook dinner, but, can be a slippery slope. We try our best not to encourage this habit and find that she probably watches an hour of TV a week.
I'd also be remiss if I didn't tell you that there's an innate love of Elmo and it has presented in our daughter! I swear, we hadn't watched him on TV before and until Nana gave us an Elmo book for Halloween, didn't have him in a book -- and yet, she knows who he is and says his name with great adoration! Hence, the immediate shift of pending birthday party theme from mommy's choice of the Very Hungry Caterpillar to ELMO! :)

Enough 'talking', here are some pictures:

2 years...

Two years ago was the scariest day of my (our) life, so far. I woke at 4am with a broken bag of water gushing everywhere. I jolted Mike awake, dressed quickly, called Duke's OB on call, woke the in-laws to explain and rushed out the door. The ride to the hospital was a hurried, but, quiet, dark one. I couldn't have imagined the fear and the journey that lay ahead. That was to be my last car ride for 65 long, long, loinng days. I was admitted to the antepartum unit on the 7th floor of Duke University Hospital with one goal: keep the baby cookin'. Through some sort of miracle, Rachael remained with just little bits of fluid in my belly until 31 weeks and 6 days gestation, after the water breaking at 23 weeks, 1 day gestation.
I come to this day in complete disbelief on many levels:
~ wow! has it been two years already?
~ wow -- it feels like that was a lifetime ago!
~ wow -- I could not picture Nov 14, 2011 on that fateful day two years ago!
Mostly, I'm surrounded by a feeling of complete thanksgiving -- for the medical staff who cared for us, for the healing presence of our God, for the love and compassion of our family and friends and for the precious little girl who lights up each and every day.

A Busy Saturday...with a first haircut!

This past weekend, we had a great Saturday in the Concini house:
We took Rachael for her first haircut, then, we went to Barnes & Noble for some new books, and ended the morning with lunch at Jason's deli. It was such fun family time -- both kids did great in all 3 places! (It's not typical for us to go 3 places in one clip -- so, I was impressed.)
In the afternoon, Ben wore his NCSU onesie to cheer on the Wolfpack (Daddy graciously agreed to let Ben wear the shirt for the 'big' game vs UNC.) and after nap, Rachael had her two friends, Claire and Evan over for a playdate. Mommy got to enjoy time with Claire & Evan's mommies.
It was a great, busy day...here it is in pictures:

Time to get with the program...

OK...so, my babies' lives are flying by and I'm busy enjoying it, rather than documenting it! However, there comes a time when you have to stop and just. blog it. (really? did I just write that?)

Let me bring you up to speed:
Months 5 & 6 for Ben: He continues to be a happy, peaceful, gentle baby. He has earned his name that Gammy so aptly gave him: "Gentle Ben". His eyes are kind and his smile comes easily. He continues to babble with lots of consonant sounds: ba, ba, ba....ummmm.....ummmm...and our favorite, bwep, bwep, bwep. He laughs when you find his tickle spots and is immediately attracted to playing with the school bus, the fire truck and anything with wheels -- what is it with boys and wheels? (fire, too, I'm sure!)
As for other milestones, he started taking solid foods on a daily basis by October 1 and the 'official' date for sitting up by himself on October 13th. He loves fruits and YoBaby yogurt, but, he's not a fan of veggies...in fact, he'll make himself gag on peas. (Sweet potatoes and carrots are the only exception!) He's lifting up on his knees and rocking back and forth...I bet we'll have a crawler by Christmas. He had his first trip to the beach with Mimi & Papa and isn't quite yet a beach bum -- but, that will come with time!

Months 19 and 20 for Rachael: Ahhhh...the diva! She continues to amaze us with her language...and truly in these two months has just embraced her voice -- in all ways! On September 16th, we heard her first sentence, said when dumping dry cheerios out of a bowl: "me made mess!" (very proudly!) And, then, there were the moments of her voice that weren't so thrilling...we had some trying times figuring out how to handle the inevitable tantrums that go along with understanding so many things, but, not being in full control of your emotions. She enjoys dancing and asking us to sing "I'm Bringing Home A Baby Bumblebee" and "Itsy Bitsy Spider". She loves to play outside as much as possible and when inside, she enjoys her tea set, using the shape sorter, "cooking" in her kitchen and reading books -- The Very Hungry Caterpillar, The Little Engine That Could, Goodnight Moon are among her favorites. She has gravitated towards her "blankie" and "glowie" which she religiously carries to bed.
And, now for some photos:

The dichotomy of parenthood...

Hello, long lost blog! I have found my way back to you. I'm sorry for the complete and utter neglect, but, life. happens.

So...the thing that's on my mind: the constant pulling/tugging of parenthood:
While at work: I can't wait to see my babies. When will it be 5 o'clock? OR Boy, I'm so glad I'm at work....no one to lug around and no diapers to change.
While at home: How long until they go to bed? OMG, I can't take anymore crying...whining....tantrums. OR How sweet is it when Rachael gives Ben a kiss on the head? Oh, my, I love Ben's precious smile. Snuggling with Rachael while reading goodnight books is the BEST.
While with friends or out with Mike: Oh, I needed this! OR I wonder what the kiddos are doing? I hope they're behaving. I really miss them. Oh, look at all of these people with babies...thank goodness for this (insert activity) without kids.

How is it that a Mom can feel these things? They seem to be in direct conflict with each other.....sometimes unable to get enough of your children and sometimes having TOO much of your children (and their snot, drool and dirty diapers!). This mixed-bag has been very evident to me lately and one that I'm wrestling with:
When I long for some adult-only time, does this mean I'm not a good Mom? When I'm wishing that I could be home with my kids each day, does this mean I'm not a good employee? When I use up all of my energy with my children and have very little left for my husband, does this mean I'm not a good wife?
I suppose the ebb and flow of these feelings and questions is what this role in my life is about...and learning to manage each side of it is the challenge, at least for me.

I do also need to wish my husband -- the best partner, friend and father of my children -- a happy sixth wedding anniversary! These years have been some of the hardest and sweetest of my life and I wouldn't want to go through these years with anyone else!

I promise...the next post will have pictures and updates about the kiddos and what they're up to!

The Diva...in all her glory!

As I was filing the most recent set of pictures from our camera...I was taken aback by the many faces of Rachael....also known as, the diva! Let me show you her attitude:

Happy girl...California dreamin' in my sunglasses

Oh, puleeez, people. I'm busy!

Seriously...let me get my glasses on straight and then it's all business!

I'm not feelin' the Hokies yet. When does the season start?

Happy girl again!

Marked as Christ's own forever...

Sunday, August 14, 2011
Baptism Day for Ben

What a weekend! We got to have our family here and spend lots of time together celebrating (and eating!) for Ben's baptism. It was truly a great time to gather and witness as Ben was marked sealed by the waters of baptism and marked as Christ's own forever.
Ben did fairly well....he grumbled through the beginning portion of the baptism as we gathered around the font, as his morning nap was nearing. When Rector George scooped him up, he seemed to take note that this was a time for quiet and patiently let George put the water on his head and bless him. The same thing happened when the sign of the cross was made on his forehead.
Some pictures of Ben's big day...

4 months!

Happy four months, Ben! You're 1/3 of the way through your first year -- where is the time going?
Here are your stats:
weight: 13lbs, 9oz  -- 25th percentile
height: 24.5 inches -- 25th percentile
head: 35th percentile (can't remember measurement!)

More importantly than the the numbers, on your 18 week birthday (July 27!), you ROLLED OVER from BACK TO FRONT (the hard way!) first! I've been watching you curl up on your side for a week or so, but, then you went all the way over. And, while you were on your belly, you proudly lifted your head and smiled!
You still continue to be the happiest baby and are content 99% of the time! Sadly, you had your first ear infection (diagnosed on 7/20) and a fever that lasted 9 days to go with it. Not fun, but, in your contented way, you handled it with very little (if any) fussing or complaining. Fortunately, at last check you're all cleared up. We're hoping and praying that you won't follow down your big sister's path in regards to ears!

We love you, Ben!

My fairy tale...

As I was up giving Ben his 4am bottle, I was passing the time by indulging myself in a little 'trash TV' - "The Bachelorette". In this particular episode, the star and her suitors are in Fiji. They're sharing exciting adventures -- diving off a cliff by a waterfall, riding in a helicopter, sailing in a yacht and snorkeling along the Great Barrier Reef. They're also sharing romantic dinners and the more romantic 'fantasy suite'. I'm watching all of this unfold in front of me and as I prop a sleeping Ben on my shoulder and rub his back, I realize this: I'm living my own fairy tale.
No, it doesn't include waterfalls (unless you mean spilled milk or spit up).
It doesn't include snorkeling (unless you mean squirty toys in the bath tub).
It doesn't include sailing in a yacht (unless you count the plastic boat in the baby pool).
And the only version of a helicopter you'll find at our house is the "super baby flying Ben" game that Daddy does with a smiley Ben.
It doesn't include romantic dinners prepared without sleeping children upstairs
And, fantasy suites are a memory of our honeymoon in Cabo!

My fairy tale is much better than that! It includes:

• two precious babies who can light up my darkest moment with a smile or a hug and for whom I would do anything
• a partner/love/friend/husband and father of my children who will do anything for us and gives us all of him at every turn.
• family who know us and love us anyway! (And let us bring our stomach bug and pink eye to their home.)
• friends who care for us in so many ways and add such fun to our lives on a daily basis
• for me, the opportunity to touch the lives of college students every day. for Mike, the chance to use his knowledge and skills to serve his clients to the fullest extent.
• a beautiful home with projects just waiting for willing hands and an expanded wallet!
• a church community that helps us to sustain our faith, even when life gets in the way.

This is the stuff fairy tales are made of. I am working on keeping this idea and the list of things to be thankful for in the front of my mind more often, so, I don't get buried by the clutter of daily living. 

I hope and pray that you are living your fairy tale...no matter how seemingly 'normal'. :)

18 months!

18 months ago today, I was laying in bed at Duke Univ Hospital denying that my regular contractions were going to bring the delivery of our precious baby girl! Boy, how wrong I was! As the doctors watched my contractions get closer together and Rachael's heart rate dip along with those contractions, they decided it was go-time.

At 3:40pm Rachael came in to the world and I cried with thanksgiving for a baby who beat the odds and for the end of a terrifying pregnancy. I can't tell you how much "easier" these 18 months have been in comparison to the 4 months of bedrest. While, yes, there are some days that I wish someone would make me stay in bed, I spend many more days laughing with, singing to, talking to and cheering on and being amazed (and, ok, sometimes frustrated by) our little girl.

She is: independent, determined, funny, dramatic, sweet, and oh-so-devilish as she runs away when you're trying to retrieve the TV remote that she 'stole' from it's right place. She's really beginning to use many two or three word phrases and is starting to understand the relationship/concept of please and thank you; hello and goodbye. She's had the words for a while, but, now she recognizes when they should be used.
She loves to help you put your shoes on, wash her own hands at the sink, play outside (with or without water), have tea parties, play in the gym at school and hug her baby brother, much to mama's panic.

We'll get her stats recorded on Friday at the doctor, I'll be back to update for our 'records'.

Wordless Wednesday

From Newborn to Infant

This is according to Enfamil, the makers of formula, that have suggested a different formula, the Newborn type, be used for babies up to 3 months of age. If you've seen the ad, "I'm a newborn, not an infant". Can I just say that Ben will be a newborn until he walks??? :)

So, yesterday we celebrated Ben's 3 month birthday! I took the requisite picture (see below) and we gave him a bath and a weigh in: 12lbs, 12oz. That's 6lbs over his birth weight -- way to go, buddy! He's got a healthy appetite and more than that, a precious smile and a calm demeanor...what a gift to our family. He seems to be interested more and more in toys overhead and in batting at them and holding his hands together, really getting the mid-line. This is all developmentally appropriate. He's not a big fan of tummy time...just sort of submits to it, but, it's not his favorite, by far. He has big smiles for his sister, especially when she's supplying a blanket to keep him warm.

And, ten days ago, marked Rachael's 17 month birthday! Where has our first 'newborn' gone? She is just growing and changing before our eyes! She really loves to kick a ball and crawl through tunnels in the gym at school. She's also a really good helper in the classroom -- putting things away where they belong. Can't wait til we can get her to do that at home. After school and on the weekends, she loves to play with friends -- Evan, Samantha, Emily and Claire. It's been a ton of fun to have Evan right across the street -- the two squeal when seeing each other for the first time after school. Swapping toys and going from driveway to driveway are favorite pasttimes.
When hanging with her buddy Samantha, the two like to wrestle and can be found in their booster seats screaming back and forth across the dinner table. Ahhh.....fun times! Samantha just welcomed her baby brother Jackson and we had fun getting together with Shannon, Phil, Samantha and baby Jackson...now we've gone from 4 to 8! We've doubled! It'll be exciting to see Ben and Jackson grow up so close in age...just two months apart.
Last, but not least, we celebrated Father's Day last weekend with  a very special visit from the cousins: Mary, Darren and baby Devon and Allyson, Nick, three-year-old Alex and baby Aidan! Just a year ago, Alex and Rachael were the only two on the scene. Here we are, one year later -- 5 kids 3 and under! (See the photo below!)
Nick, Darren and Mike are wonderful daddies to these children and loving husbands to us girls! We are so blessed.
We're looking forward to a 4th of July and college graduation celebration for my baby brother, Alex in northern VA with family next week -- can't wait!

Happy Summer!

They make it "all better"

You know that phrase? When you fall and scrape your knee and Mom promises to make it "all better"? Well, today was one of those days and honestly, having these sweet babies to hold made it "all better". Let me tell you about this day.....
Rachael was scheduled for a follow-up VCUG -- it's an x-ray involving a catheter and being strapped down to a narrow board while the technician fills your bladder and watches the bladder and kidneys. Needless to say, it is NOT a fun procedure, as anything that involves strapping a child down certainly isn't good.
Well, we requested that they give Rachael some light sedation to help make her more comfortable (and compliant) for this procedure. Therefore, we had three appointments today at Duke: 1) Getting the sedation -- just some valium-like medicine to help her relax (HA!) 2) the VCUG itself  and 3) the follow-up with the Urologist.
Let me give you the arranged schedule for the day:
Appt # 1: 10am.
Appt # 2: 10:45am
Appt #3: 1:20pm.

Let me tell you the ACTUAL times:
Appt #1: 11:45am - - YES -- 1 hour and 45 minutes after the scheduled start!
Appt #2: 12:30pm
Appt #3: 2:25pm

This is all the while dealing with an almost-17 month old and an 11 week old.....they don't do delays and LONG appointments. We were in 3 waiting areas, three treatment rooms, and saw two doctors and 4 technicians. The two of them were both troopers....managing as well as they could given the scenario! Mike and I were very frustrated and disappointed with the staff at Duke.....our poor Urologist, who we like very much, had to apologize profusely for the lack of service, even if it wasn't her fault.
Why am I telling you my tale of woe? For sympathy? (Well, ok, maybe a little would be nice..... :) ) but, truly, I'm really telling this story to say that these babies made this day "all better", even after all they had been through.
When we arrived home, Rachael was playing with her toys and Ben and I were sitting nearby on the floor. She came over and turned her back to us and backed her little rear end right up to my cross-legged lap and said "sit down" on her way there. (Luckily, I shifted baby brother out the way, just in time!) She then put her head back on my chest, fingers in her mouth and cuddled in to me. At that moment...holding both babies in my arms....giving them each kisses on their sweet heads...all of the day's chaos and craziness melted away. They make it "all better" and make each day, no matter how nutty, the best day anyway.
Sweet Rachael and Ben....I hope you know and that I tell you and SHOW you how much you mean to me, each and every day. I am honored to be your Mom...there's no better thing on earth!

Here's What's New with the Concini Crew

Wow...it must be late. Or I'm tired...or dazed....or overworked and underpaid. The rhyme in the title of this post is cheesy to the max. A rhyme, seriously?
Anyway....
What a month it has been since last I wrote. I'm chuckling to myself that in the last post, I mentioned that I'd be back to talk about the mysteries of raising two....well, let me tell you, the mystery is how to write a blog post when there are 2 under 2 in the house!
The last month in numbers:
2 1/2: how many pounds Ben has gained (he's 11lbs!) and I have lost.
1/2: the number of pounds that Rachael has gained and lost!
4: the number of antibiotics Rachael has had for the same ear infection. Tubes, here we come....on June 2nd.
7: the number of hours a night that Ben sleeps! (Hooray!)
24-28: the ounces of formula that Ben takes in a day.
48: the number of hours that I was away from my babies (and hubby) for the NCACE conference.
125: the number of folks that honored me with my first standing ovation as I received the Furney K. James Outstanding Service award at the conference....I am humbled to have been thought of by my peers!
500: the number of dollars (although I quit counting after 100 :) that I've spent in Target in the last month....
1000+: the number of temper tantrums Rachael has thrown.... :) She's the sweetest and crankiest cutie pie around. Being 16 months is hard...you know what you want and you're sure that you're capable of climbing mountains, but, you can't communicate OR climb the mountain - or slide- for real.
Countless: the number of times (in the past month) that I've thanked God for a wonderful husband who puts up with me.

Also, for fun, here's a list of some of the things Rachael says:
all done (even though she doesn't  know what it really means)
get down
bye (wave from the wrist)
hi (said really loudly in Ben's face when he's in the bouncy or when picking up a phone or remote control!)
thank you - sounds like dan-doo
feet
nose
mine
nana (banana -- sorry Nana - - she'll get it)
Lacey
fishy
school (skoo)
tree
see (can mean seat)
sit
outside
inside
up
more
milk (malk...with the German sounding k at the end)
duck
shoe
ear (eeee - with finger lodged in ear)
eye
cheese
uh-oh

And...if you're still reading, here are some pictures:

2nd Mother's Day...1st with a son! Love you, Ben!

Little brother, big sister!

Reading bedtime stories on Mother's Day with Rachael

Ben is ONE MONTH old!

OK...he's one month and 3 days...but who's counting? :)
We're thrilled to have this little love in our lives...he's mostly an easy-going, laid back baby, except when his tummy won't cooperate. Can you blame him? I'm not happy when my belly is upset, too.
Since coming home one month ago today, we've had visits from all of the grandparents and great-grandmother, Gammy, and we've celebrated Ben's first Easter.
Big sister Rachael is adjusting rather well...the first week was a little rough, but, now that she's decided he's a permanent fixture, most of her time is spent trying to kiss his toes. (Which she sometimes does with much gusto....and slobber!)
We are taking monthly pictures of Ben with his first teddy bear, so, that by his one year mark, we'll have 12 shots to show how he has grown. Here's the first one, the one month shot, compared to the one week shot.
Interestingly, he's wearing the same onesie in each picture....he looks much fuller, don't you think?
And, he should look fuller, because on his one month birthday, he weighed in at 8lbs, 11oz -- 1 oz shy of two pounds above birth weight! And, even more than his coming home weight of 6lbs, 1oz. The boy likes to eat, what can I say?

I'll be back with more thoughts on having 2 kiddos at home and other such mysteries!

Ben's first days....

Mommy adoring Ben...I've dreamt of having a picture of
holding a newborn in a hospital bed...it's finally come true!

Showing Ben off for the camera

Peace out, peeps! Dressed and ready to go home!

Heading for the car with Mommy

Day 1 at home with big sister...in our coordinating outfits

One week old...in my "just born" onesie...monthly pictures to follow!

Rachael enjoying Nana's baked ziti...it was so good, it had to go in my hair.

Taking a post-bath nap in Daddy's arms

Well, we are settled in at home with Mr. Ben...otherwise known as "little buddy", "big guy", "Benjamin Button", and "little brother", "Mr. Man". Overall, I'd say this first week (or ten days) has gone really well. Ben is pretty laid-back and other than having his nights and days mixed up, we're enjoying cuddling with him every chance we get. Rachael is adjusting...the hardest part is that I can't lift her and she can't figure out why. Thank goodness Mike has been off this week and we've been able to have one-on-one time with Ben during the day and navigate our four-some at night.
I have to say....I have had many moments of being awe-struck this week...especially when I look at Mike holding Rachael while I hold Ben and think that I just need to pinch myself. How could this dream have come true? How could 3 years of struggles have led us to this? When will the other shoe drop? (The internal pessimist never quite goes away!)
I also thought I'd have to "make room" in my heart for Ben...you know, by taking away something else for him to fit in. NOT TRUE! My heart expanded and it's like he's always been there and I love him as much as I love his big sister, each for who and what they are.
Ben, sweetheart, we are so glad you are here and healthy.